Usually, this is where I makeup some pathetic excuse as to why I haven't blogged
in so long. But not today. In fact, If the good Lord hadn't beckoned for another
rambling, you all would still be waiting. What can I say, I feel uninspired.
Nothing has really grabbed me, screaming, "wake up" like I would love it to.
Last night we did a tribute to my best friend Santhosh. I don't understand why, neither will I ever understand why he was taken so early.40 ain't no age to take an indefinite vacation to the land of no return. I miss him. He was a real fun guy, put everyone before himself. But I knew his hurt, his bad hurtful past, and I have come to the conclusion that he was taken so he can hurt no more. Body soul and mind! Everybody only knew the funny, always smiling and ever-so helpful Santhosh. I knew more. He was my crazy friend, I may not have a single picture with him but I have memories that will last a life time.
On a different note.. I love being apart of a book club ....(My book club is pretty much me and my 500 odd books but I usually go online and read & post reviews ) It has been a lot of fun reading different stuff and talking about it. Honestly, it keeps me sane. Loneliness is an unrelenting bitch that shackles you to her cold bed posts while she has her way with you, and you scream for her to stop, for some relief, but it is usually hard to find....dang I sound like a freakin guy! I did also see Chennai Express. It was awesome. The story is good, the music is great. If you haven't seen it, it's good, clean comedy - a laugh riot, I recommend it. Good stuff!!!
I don't know what to do with myself. I find myself constantly wrestling with my own thoughts, my opinions, my beliefs, my disbeliefs. Sometimes, I even lose sleep over it. I'm glad I can talk to my friends about things and it truly does help to hear their support and their thoughts. I guess I would just like a break every once in a while. I try to be a person that cares about others but it's hard when you feel like such a colossal fuck-up. I hope that I am more of a blessing than a burden to those I run across. And if I fail you, I truly am sorry. I remember thinking when I was a child that life would get easier when I got older. But the truth is, it is just life. It doesn't get easier or harder, it just is. It's a series of experiences and choices and you learn as you go and realize that it has always been difficult and yet here you are, somehow, miraculously. At least, that's how I see it. Maybe that's why I like the movie "Curious case of Benjamin Button" so much. Time is neutral. It doesn't shift favor when it starts or passes by. Whether old to young or young to old, it is the experiences and choices that meet us along the way that shape us and effect us more deeply than anything else. It is also interesting how I am writing a hell of a lot more than I had expected to when I started. Kinda funny. Do me a favor. Go outside and smell the air. I love the smell of November cant really call it Fall in this part of the world. So crisp and clean. Reminds me of childhood. I sooooo wish you can visit an authentic Irish Pub and get yourself a pint of true, slow-poured Guinness out of the tap. It just might bring your life a little extra joy. I think that's good for now.
Last night we did a tribute to my best friend Santhosh. I don't understand why, neither will I ever understand why he was taken so early.40 ain't no age to take an indefinite vacation to the land of no return. I miss him. He was a real fun guy, put everyone before himself. But I knew his hurt, his bad hurtful past, and I have come to the conclusion that he was taken so he can hurt no more. Body soul and mind! Everybody only knew the funny, always smiling and ever-so helpful Santhosh. I knew more. He was my crazy friend, I may not have a single picture with him but I have memories that will last a life time.
On a different note.. I love being apart of a book club ....(My book club is pretty much me and my 500 odd books but I usually go online and read & post reviews ) It has been a lot of fun reading different stuff and talking about it. Honestly, it keeps me sane. Loneliness is an unrelenting bitch that shackles you to her cold bed posts while she has her way with you, and you scream for her to stop, for some relief, but it is usually hard to find....dang I sound like a freakin guy! I did also see Chennai Express. It was awesome. The story is good, the music is great. If you haven't seen it, it's good, clean comedy - a laugh riot, I recommend it. Good stuff!!!
I don't know what to do with myself. I find myself constantly wrestling with my own thoughts, my opinions, my beliefs, my disbeliefs. Sometimes, I even lose sleep over it. I'm glad I can talk to my friends about things and it truly does help to hear their support and their thoughts. I guess I would just like a break every once in a while. I try to be a person that cares about others but it's hard when you feel like such a colossal fuck-up. I hope that I am more of a blessing than a burden to those I run across. And if I fail you, I truly am sorry. I remember thinking when I was a child that life would get easier when I got older. But the truth is, it is just life. It doesn't get easier or harder, it just is. It's a series of experiences and choices and you learn as you go and realize that it has always been difficult and yet here you are, somehow, miraculously. At least, that's how I see it. Maybe that's why I like the movie "Curious case of Benjamin Button" so much. Time is neutral. It doesn't shift favor when it starts or passes by. Whether old to young or young to old, it is the experiences and choices that meet us along the way that shape us and effect us more deeply than anything else. It is also interesting how I am writing a hell of a lot more than I had expected to when I started. Kinda funny. Do me a favor. Go outside and smell the air. I love the smell of November cant really call it Fall in this part of the world. So crisp and clean. Reminds me of childhood. I sooooo wish you can visit an authentic Irish Pub and get yourself a pint of true, slow-poured Guinness out of the tap. It just might bring your life a little extra joy. I think that's good for now.
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