Stop beating yourself up and let go

Everyone goes through hell, but not everyone stays there. Stop tormenting yourself by reliving the pain over and over. Good people go through terrible things, but wise people know when and how to let it go. We all know that wisdom does not come easy, it often comes from painful experience. Many of us are very unwise in how we handle our pain. Like an animal that struggles in a steel trap, we worsen our wounds the way we struggle, deny, and fight against what simply, is. When we refuse to learn the wisdom of acceptance, we become our own tormentors. When we refuse to let go we suffer, yet we cannot let go of something until it has taught us what we need to learn. Letting go is a process of recognition, confrontation, acceptance, and healing. Letting go simply means not suffering any more than absolutely necessary, but just enough to expand and strengthen ourselves. Some suffering is needed to deepen our compassion, to grow, and to learn. Letting go means you have learned enough, and now have compassion for yourself. Letting go means not touching that sore spot until it is infected, and instead letting it heal. Letting go means carrying a permanent scar, but not a permanent wound. Letting go means you may have walked through hell, but came out the other side ready to make your life a heaven. Letting go means you refuse to be a victim forever, by letting one moment define the rest of your life. Letting go means you accept change, and you accept that your pain is not permanent. Letting go means you accept that you cannot take away the past, but you insist that the past cannot take away your future. Letting go means you are ready to move forward and live. Letting go means you are no longer afraid. It was always fear that held you prisoner; letting go means you are finally free.

Entwined Forever

The stars shine in their splendor

whispering low, their ancient mystery.

Dazzling, and bejeweled, oh what a sight!

Like diamonds spread on black velvet 

Amazed, I drink in their beauty,

I only wish it could be every single night!

Could it be wishful thinking?

In the quiet stillness of the night

when one can feel the creator’s mysterious power.

Magnetizing and energizing,

I feel it in the air, like a sacred prayer.

But then, I am but reminded 

that the silent observer is more them than I.

In all their majesty,

They watch our souls take of in dreamless flight,

as we merge into the Milky Way, like a golden ray.

Iridescent light of golden bliss,

an ever starry midnight kiss.

Crossing paths with our mortal souls

entwined forever, through our heart.

It's good to be home

Deep set eyes lost in thought, or filled with a haze instead of beautiful brown eyes.

More of an intimidating smirk than the big friendly smile

No Warm bone crushing hugs. 

Just a hello and a kiss in the air,

Out of courtesy perhaps...

Will return the unpleasant pleasantries, shall we?

Until...

Until, your alone with me...

and then eyes that are always lost in thought, some how twinkle like beady Christmas lights

the smirk disappears only to allow for that beautiful smile to reach his eyes

A warm embrace or should I call it a big bear hug? I'd rather it be called my wrap of love,
Like the warmth of my favorite blanky, on a cold winter night

Butterfly kisses for my forehead, and my eyes,
my cheeks and my nose
and a whisper that it's good to be home...

Passionate kisses,
and a giggle every time he misses,

Untill two become one ....

Who said time stops for no man?

In nothingness there is fulfillment,
Time and tide does halt
And in that brief moment
Between feeling nothing and everything, I say " It's good to have you home"

When we kiss...

When we kiss,

Its what my heart used to dream off ,

Long before I knew you

It's the kind of kiss that inspires stars

to climb into the sky and light up the world.

The kind that melts my soul,

The kind that wishes you were mine.

The road once traveled....

Deny it all you want,

wear you plastic smile

Cry in your hot shower, so you can tell the world

That your turn red , with hot water

A little too familiar, the scent of dove

Orange, red, tooth pastes, perfumed creams, towels

waiting in bed....

Bitter sweet memories they sure make..

How easily it all disappeared ,

with one big giant wave of temporary insanity..

Here we are at it again, like nothing ever happened

yet as two changed people, a past, a present , a future

the comfort of knowing and the fear of not knowing

as we travel this path

We smile, we laugh, we spew , we pretend, we love, we hate

But remember my dear

Everything we did, we do or

will ever do will be another attempt

To escape this cruel  life

and a hope, that maybe , just, maybe....

this time around we will feel less pain.

The path to happiness :)

Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore.

Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. Give up your need to always be right

 There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question:

 “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”  ~Wayne Dyer

What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. Give up your need for control

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” ~Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame

 Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk

 Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” ~Eckhart Tolle

5. Give up your limiting beliefs

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind.” ~Elly Roselle

6. Give up complaining

 Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change

 Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.” ~Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels

 Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.

 “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” ~Wayne Dyer

11. Give up on your fears

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” ~Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. Give up your excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

You were always stronger than your fear and pain

There is an intelligent healing process inside of you that knows how to absorb pain and transform it into wisdom. But to heal, you have to give yourself to the pain. You cannot avoid facing yourself your whole life. If you avoid your truthful emotions and pain you will implode and contract into a diminished and feeble state. Growth and empowerment requires reflection and facing the frightening, ugly, hard and unbearable reality. People are often clever masters at fooling themselves and not seeing the obvious right in front of them. One of the fastest ways to move through your pain is to get a grip on reality. Real transformation requires real honesty. If you want to move forward — get real with yourself!

When you are avoiding your pain you are really only avoiding your growth. Get up in your pain's face eyeball to eyeball and say, "I'm not afraid of you!" The biggest liar you will ever meet is yourself. It is amazing the lies we tell ourselves because of fear. Stop your lying-mind dead in its tracks; no more running in frantic circles of nonsensical denial. No more blaming. No more neglecting. No more dodging and running. Suck it up. Swallow it. The only end to your pain is through fully consuming it and digesting it, otherwise it will consume you. When you face your fears in the light of openness and honesty they will vanish. We carry many of these dark fears inside of us; frightening forms of mental obstacles that cast shadows on every beautiful possibility.

It is tragic the way fearful people put all of their fears and insecurities into others; the way they strangle their dreams — often in the name of love. Some people run from pain their whole lives, and what pain they do not digest they inflict upon others. You can't run from your pain forever. Avoiding pain causes endless suffering for you and others. Avoiding pain is really selfishness. When you face your pain you will discover you were always stronger than your pain. Your pain was always a fraud; appearing inescapable, unsurmountable and even necessary and a friend. The time has come to say goodbye to the afflictions you have been carrying, nurturing, protecting and empowering. When you truly face your pain you will only see yourself. Your fear was always you. Fear is a prison where you are the jailer. Free yourself! Anything you want is just beyond your fear. Your healing hour has arrived the moment you decide to live fully and powerfully. That moment is now.